Learning Center
Attachment · 5 min read
What secure attachment actually looks like
Secure attachment isn't a child who never cries. It's a child who reaches for their person when things go wrong — and finds them there.
The still face experiment
When a caregiver stops responding, a baby will work to regain connection — babbling, reaching, protesting. The distress is not the problem. The distress is the child telling us that connection matters.
Comfort seeking is health
A securely attached child uses their caregiver as a base to explore and a haven to return to. The exploration is the growth. The return is the trust.
Takeaways
- ·A child who runs to you is a child who trusts you.
- ·Independence grows out of secure dependence.
Reflection
- "What did you do when you were scared as a child? Where did you go?"
Further reading
- Bowlby — A Secure Base
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